Saturday, September 24, 2022

Some Favorite Gunsmoke Lines and Scenes (Video)

Re-posted by N.S.


Anonymous said...

Great show--not a black to be seen.


Anonymous said...

Other little known scenes(which were eliminated from the YouTube clips because they weren't politically correct.)

Matt:What is it,Chester?
Chester:There's some dark skinned critters just came into town and they're giving Miss Kitty some trouble at the saloon.They're threatening to hit people with bricks.
Matt:I'll take care of it.
(Seconds later--gun blasts)
Chester:What happened,Mr.Dillon?
Matt:Let's just say Dodge City is back to 100% White.
* * * *

Festus:Math-HEW,I heard the Biden clan just rolled into town.
Matt:Biden clan--who are they?
Doc:They're out of Washington,Matt.The leader--Joe Biden--talks so stupidly,he makes Festus sound like he's got a brain--AND they're commies!
Matt:Tell 'em to keep moving--they're not welcome here.They can water their horses,but THAT'S IT-- point 'em to Portland,I hear that town's in the toilet anyways.

* * * *

Miss Kitty(walking into the sheriff’s office):Hey Matt.
Matt:Hi,Kitty--who's watching the saloon?
Miss Kitty:Sam's over there.Matt,we've got trouble--about 2 million Mexicans are coming up from the South and they're headed this way.
Matt:What for?They have their own country.
Miss Kitty:Exactly,Matt. What are we going to do?
Matt:Put up a sign at our city limits:"Now Entering Mexico"--THAT'LL get rid of them.Have this week's guest star,Ricardo Montalban write it in Spanish."
Miss Kitty:Brilliant idea--all of them read the sign and went back South.

Matt:Right--NOW,send some people--ahead of them on horseback--down to the Mexican border,to post,"Now Entering America" signs before they get there.

Doc:How'd you get so smart,Matt?

Matt:It's in the script,Doc--come on--let's go have a drink.We got rid of blacks,the Bidens and 2 million Mex in one montage--a very good day to be in Dodge City.

Festus::You could say we "dodged" three big problems,right Math-HEW?
Matt:Yeah Festus--you could say that. I guess you really ARE smarter than Joe Biden.