By Grand Rapids Anonymous
sunday, july 13, 2025 at 1:08:00 a.m. edt
["Are you at the chicago weekend bullet stats watch party"?!]
Weekend at Brandon’s
Or as it should be called, “Weekend at Brandon’s.” Part comedy, part chicagoans getting shot in the back, then dragged off and propped up at the dinner table ‘til the heat wears off.
(Knock on door)
“It’s the police, open up.”
“Whachoowant?”
(opens door)
“We got a report Shitavious Jones was killed by you today.”
“Nawww, mannn. He’s right here—eatin’ dinner with us—see honkey pig? Wave to the honkey, Shitavious.”
(Arm goes up limply)
“All right, but we’re watching you. Hey, why are there all those flies around him?
“Around a nigga named Shitavious? It ain’t cuz he smells like perfume, honkey.”
“Riiight. Well, we might stop back in.”
(Cop leaves—another murder unreported).
--END
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