By Abolish Tenure
thursday, july 31, 2025 at 7:02:00 p.m. edt
The Epstein Files are getting tiresome
Yawn! Promises overmade, promises underkept. You let the rubes work themselves up into believing everything they wanted to believe about The Epstein Files, all the crazy stuff they posted from Mom's basement into Torba's gabspiracy hq comment threads. Trouble is that the customers ordered the product they thought you promised but it doesn't look anything at all like the picture on the website.
All you got is whatever you inherited from a deep state full of politicized fiction writers who loved Christopher Steele's work on the trump-moscow dossier thriller. They had years, including almost nine months since the election to add/edit/delete at their pleasure with the finest secret tools of deepstate technology.
So by now "The Files" probably show Bill Clinton making 28 visits helping children rescue endangered tropical species and deepfake video of elected republicans and their big donors banging pre-teens and passing classified documents via russian honeypots' bodily orifices. The ai has created "proof" of Epstein's suicide and it's impressive how quickly the 14-fingered ai version of Epstein tied his own noose.
The golfer-in-chief meant well but he hit this one into the rough. The democrats cleverly said "Play the ball where it lies, release the files, make our day," and that sent Mike McBible into hiding for five weeks. There will be so much work piled up in the capitol after labor day - and so little time - that lil' Mikey will tell us we can't have debates on everything, we just have to do a giant omnibus bigbeautifulsh*tsandwich sequel, and then pressure everyone to vote yes at 1:00 a.m. on dec. 24 to avoid a shutdown and save Christmas, or you won't get presidenttrump's endorsement in nov. 26.
So tired of this drama. Just balance the damn budget, will ya?
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1 comment:
"Flag thrown,let's see what the call is."
"Ref:"Delay of files,flagrant foul,."
"Which means absolutely nothing,does it,John Madden."
"That's right,Pat. You see on the telestrator,the files were here,on her desk,in March-- I've circled them---right THERE. NOW they're gone--I'm circling her empty hands--HERE. "
"Quite a gadget you have at your disposal,John--the telestrator."
"I never leave home without it. You can circle swollen ankles,black thugs attacking Whites in Cincinnati,poop on a San Francisco street--ANYTHING."
"What will they think up next--afterlife John Maddens and Pat Summeralls?"
"I doubt it,but if they do,there'd better be a telestrator that's there with us."
"And bourbon. Okay,back to the game."
--GRA
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