Tuesday, February 11, 2020

After Sen. Michael Bennet Drops Out of Presidential Race, Reporters Interview His Wife

By Nicholas Stix

Reporter: “Prof. Bennet, are you relieved now that your husband has left the maelstrom of a presidential campaign?”

Prof. Bennet: “I don’t know what you’re talking about.

“Sweetie?”

Sen. Bennet: “Oh, I’m sorry, honey, I meant to tell you but it just slipped my mind. I was running for president, but I thought better of it. It’s all over.

“I have to run to pick up our daughter from school. Excuse me.”

(Reader’s note: The above news story is as true as your average New York Times article.)

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