“Hey, Won’t You Play, Another, Somebody, Stabbed Somebody Dead” Song?

[“In Austin, somebody stabbed some people; one dead, two wounded; cops shot the raceless, faceless, nameless perp, but failed to kill him; vics are likewise raceless, nameless, and faceless; raceless female interim (and future full-time) police chief refuses to release any information, but suggested she might release some info after everyone has forgotten about the case.”]

By Grand Rapids Anonymous
Sunday, January 21, 2024 at 9:50:00 p.m. est

B.J. Thomas’ “(Won’t You Play) Another Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Song” (slightly changed by GRA for this story)

There’s murder out tonight,
And the time seems right,
For a brand new thug song,
A “Somebody, Stabbed Somebody Dead” song.
(Piano)

Hey, won’t you play,
Another, “Somebody Stabbed Somebody Dead” song,
It was a mex at home,
Or a negro, maybe,
Or a negro, maybe.

(Piano clinking)
So someone tell me,
The fa-tality,
Is the same that we’ve heard,
Many times before.

A damn mex or black,
Completes a stupid attack,
And now the news won’t say,
Which one it is.

(Piano clinks)
Hey, won’t you say,
The ethnic group who was behind this crime—all along?
I’ll put it in the song,
This cannot be a maybe,
Cannot be a maybe.

So someone tell me,
The fa-tality,
Is the same that we've heard,
Many times before.

A damn mex or black,
Completes a stupid attack,
And now the cops won't say,
Which group it is.

Hey, won’t you play,
Another, “Somebody, Stabbed Somebody Dead” song,
It was a mex at home,
Or a negro, maybe,
Or a negro maybe.

--GRA