Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Mets Losing 1-1 in the Fourth Inning to the Team Formerly Known as the Brooklyn Dodgers in LA

By Nicholas Stix

I know what you’re thinking—“Isn’t 1-1 a tie?”

It is, if any team but the Mets is involved.

They’re presumably no longer in the fourth, but I haven’t had the never to check. Last night, I shut off the infernal machine after alleged sinkerballer Robert Gsellman gave up I think his third dinger that game in the second inning. He gave up 8 runs in 4 1/3 innings, seven of them earned, and the Mets ultimately lost, 12-0.

The other day, their newest Tommy John PTSD patient (last two years on the shelf), and soon-to-be ex-big league hurler, Zack Wheeler, gave up seven runs in two innings, and is now back on his shelf.

The Mets have the record over the past ten or so years for TJ surgeries, but they are going to extend it. “Tommy Johns on the house!”


Anonymous said...

Why is America being forced to watch the Mets 3 nights in a row?Amazin'.

Anonymous said...

I think I heard recently,forcing Guantanamo prisoners to watch the Mets has been declared illegal (along with waterboarding)as a method of torture.
But I'll bet it's very

Nicholas said...

Yes, GRA, there is clearly a crisis afoot. I may go on strike from watching them, except when Jake DeGrom pitches. Otherwise, every phase of their game is a disaster. Offense, defense. A few weeks ago, my chief of research asked if they couldn't be downgraded to minor league status.