By Grand Rapids Anonymous
sunday, april 30, 2023 at 12:36:00 p.m. edt
Officer Bob Newhart:
“Okay, Pablo, I see the report and it states you k-k-killed three teens because...they rang your doorbell and ran away?”
“Si.”
“Th-that’s it?”
“I was right in the middle of watching ‘Speedy Gonzales’ cartoons and the doorbell rings.”
“Ye-ye-yes, that happens sometimes.”
“I go to look and when I open the door, a kid is flashing his BUTT—and then he runs away!”
“We-we-well, that’s a little crude—granted, but instead of forgetting about it and going back and continuing to watch Sp-sp-speedy Gonzales, you get in your car and hunt these doorbell ringers down and kill them.”
“Si—they won’t be ringing MY doorbell anymore (laughing maniacally).”
“There’s two reasons for that, you know—one of them is b-because, prison cells don’t have d-d-doorbells, Pablo—NEXT!”
(Bob puts the file aside and picks up another from the 10-foot high pile of “Stupid Minority Criminals.”)
“Well, with this job, I know I have t-t-tons of job s-s-security. I’d better call Emily and tell her I’ll be home late again tonight.”
--GRA
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7 comments:
I can just hear Bob's voice in your text. Good job.
Thank you.
--GRA
GORDON LIGHTFOOT--A HIT MACHINE IN THE 70S--SUCCUMBS TO BEING 84
(CNN)Gordon Lightfoot, the Canadian singer-songwriter whose enduring folk hits included "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" and "Sundown," died Monday, his spokesperson told CNN. He was 84.
Lightfoot died of natural causes at 7:30 p.m. at Sunnybrook Hospital in Toronto, spokesperson Victoria Lord said.
His death comes less than a month after he canceled his 2023 US and Canada concert schedule on April 11. That cancellation was due to "health related issues" according to a Facebook post.
(GRA:Do you think there was a connection?Stupid writing.)
Lightfoot found success on the US pop charts in 1970 with the song "If You Could Read My Mind." That track also earned the artist his second of four Grammy nominations, that one for best male pop vocal performance.
His 1976 ballad about the sinking of a Great Lakes cargo ship, "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald," reached No. 2 on the Billboard charts. Other hits included "Carefree Highway and "Sundown".
--GRA
So Dr. Hartley accepts Medicaid and Obamacare patients? Poor Carol has the first contact with them. Pablo propositioned her in the crudest terms.
COMMIE WRITERS GO ON STRIKE
(nbc)Hollywood writers are closing their laptops and heading to the picket line.
Thousands of unionized scribes who say they are not paid fairly in the streaming era went on strike early Tuesday, bringing television production to a halt. It comes after high-stakes negotiations between a top guild and a trade association representing Hollywood’s marquee studios failed to avert the first walkout in more than 15 years.
The board of directors for the Writers Guild of America, which includes West Coast and East Coast branches, voted unanimously to call for a walkout and said writers face an “existential crisis.”
“The companies’ behavior has created a gig economy inside a union work force, and their immovable stance in this negotiation has betrayed a commitment to further devaluing the profession of writing,” the union said in a statement.
The Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers — a trade association that bargains on behalf of studios, television networks and streaming platforms — said in a statement that its offer included “generous increases in compensation for writers.”
GRA:Wage CUTS for these talentless woke bastards.Every show has at least one anti-White line,it seems--comedy or drama.
--GRA
After his two shows ended,Bob became a cop--here on NSU--and he stayed at about 65-70 years of age-for these purposes.I just thought Bob's style--juxtaposed with these outrageously stupid crimes--would be worth writing about.Bob would be much better at this than me,of course,but in actuality,he's in his 90s--so we're stuck with GRA's interpretations,lol .
--GRA
Bob is on Twitter occasionally.Here's from last year:
Bob Newhart
@BobNewhart
Thank you to everyone for the wonderful birthday wishes! 93 is the new 39!
11:13 AM · Sep 6, 2022
--GRA
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