Wednesday, December 25, 2024

The Afterlife Tonight Show pre-emption announcement


[WEJB/NSU’s Afterlife Christmas Spectacular.]

By Grand Rapids Anonymous
Wednesday, December 25, 2024 at 9:25:00 p.m. est

Johnny Carson: Merry Christmas, this is Johnny Carson, along with Ed McMahon, from The Afterlife Tonight Show. Joining us, on Christmas night 2024, is “Mr. Warmth”—Don Rickles.

Ed: Hello sir, Merry Christmas.

Rickles: Hello, John—still calling me “Mr. Warmth” after 50 years? You can’t come up with anything new—besides “Mr. Warmth”?

Carson: Well, I COULD call you Mr. (bleep), but that would never get past the censors.

(Rickles falls over and laughs out loud.)

Carson: Mr. (bleep) is so “warm” that, because of these stage lights, his family will be coming up to roast chestnuts over his bald head.

Rickles: That’s two for the Nebraska farm boy...zero for the Jew guest.

Carson: The usual score.

(Rickles laughs again.)

Carson: I can’t think of a better reason—and in fact—The Afterlife WEJB/NSU Christmas Spectacular is the ONLY reason I allow our show to be pre-empted all year.

There are great stars and performances by people like Bing Crosby...

Rickles: Not LIKE Bing Crosby—it IS Bing Crosby. Come on, John. I know Gunilla Hutton is here tonight looking for someone to fool around with, but keep FOCUSED!

Carson: Correct, Don—we have—in person—the real Bing Crosby, Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra...

Rickles: Nice of Frank to take some time off from beating people up on Christmas—to sing a few tunes.

(Frank walks onstage.)

Frank: Not totally taking the day off—I’ve got Mr (bleep) booked for some brass knuckles right after I sing.

Rickles: Will $50,000 get me off the hook, Frank?

Frank: Yeahhh, Don-I guess so—it IS Christmas.

Carson: So, stay tuned for some great music on WEJB/NSU’s, Afterlife Christmas Spectacular.

Ed: Hi, yoooo.

The end.

--GRA



2 comments:

Anonymous said...

jerry pdx
I gotta tell you GRA, the parodies with Don Rickles are always my favorites, whether in life or afterlife Mr. Warmth was the best.

Anonymous said...

Thanks,Jerry.

Merry Christmas

--GRA