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Friday, April 20, 2012

To Cheat a Working Girl: The Secret Service Unhappy Hooker Scandal (with Expert Analysis!)

 
Colombia's unhappy hooker, Dania Suarez: Unfortunately, they're fake, and what's real, ain't cherce. She's too thick around the middle. That may not be fat, but in any event, it makes for crappy proportions. But she is cute, and a deal's a deal. [All photos are courtesy of the Daily News.]
 
[Previously, at WEJB/NSU:

“The Secret Service Unhappy Hooker Scandal, and AOL’s Diversion Tactic.”]


By Nicholas Stix

According to a Daily News poll, a plurality of readers (49 to 46 percent) do not believe that the Unhappy Hooker scandal will hurt America’s reputation abroad. The problem with the poll, as with many Daily News polls, is that the results are ambiguous. Some respondents may not believe that the scandal will hurt our foreign reputation, because that reputation is already so bad that this is merely par for the course.

What makes us look bad is not that 11 of our SS agents allegedly frolicked with Colombian hookers in Cartagena. If anything, millions of people here and abroad sighed with relief, after having feared that “Obama” had given over the Service, like so many other previously masculine institutions, to homosexuals. The black eye came from the allegation that a presidential bodyguard would cheat a working girl.


 
See what I said? They're way too firm and high, and have too much separation. Such large breasts would have cleavage, and yield to the law of gravity, if they were real.
 

If this mope would do that in a foreign country, in which prostitution is legal, imagine what he might previously have pulled in states in America where the world’s oldest profession is illegal?

* * *

EXCLUSIVE: First photos of Colombia [sic] escort in explosive Secret Service hooker scandal
24-year-old single mom is known as Dania, she says agent offered $30 for $800 service
By Edgar Sandoval
Thursday, April 19, 2012, 2:18 p.m.; updated at 8:37 p.m.
New York Daily News

CARTAGENA, COLOMBIA - The Daily News published the first photos of the Colombian call girl whose encounter with a cheapskate Secret Service agent set off the agency’s worst sex scandal.

Dania Suarez, the 24-year-old single mom of a 9-year-old son, has gone into hiding as the scandal mushrooms, according to neighbors.

A friend stopped by late Wednesday to pick up her dog, a pug named Valentino, they said.

Suarez, originally from the island of San Andres, is a quiet tenant who rents a small apartment in a hacienda-style home for about $600 a month, neighbors said.
They often saw her go out late and come home at dawn, dangling her high heels in her hand.

“She never told us what she did for a living but it was obvious,” said Maria Quintero, 31, who lives on the first floor of the three story white building.

“She was home all day and left late at night looking very nice,” Quintero said.

 

 
“I asked her if she worked, she said no. I asked her if her boyfriend helped her, she said no. Then it hit me.”

Another neighbor, Maria Estela Cubides, 45, said Suarez seemed to have a glamorous life out on the town, but kept to herself at home.

“She always left late at night. She traveled a lot, to fancy destinations," Cubides said. “She never brought guys home. She kept to herself. I’m surprised she did all that noise to get her money. She’s not that kind of person.”

Another neighbor, Dona Betty, said Suarez told people she was a dancer.

“She showed up early in the morning, with her heels on her hands,” she said. “We suspected, but she keeps to herself. She is a good mother.”

Prostitution is legal in Colombia, and escorts, hookers and streetwalkers crowd the streets of the tourist districts.

Suarez has said she was a “high class” escort who made $800 - 1.4 million pesos - a night to dress well and provide sparkling company as well as have sex.

The average Colombian household earns $287 a month.

Eleven Secret Service agents and nine military servicemen are under investigation for hiring 20 or 21 hookers in Cartagena last week when they were supposed to be preparing for President Obama’s April 13 arrival at a regional summit.

Suarez was one of the girls brought back to the posh Hotel Caribe to party with the G-men on the night of April 11.

 

 
According to the story Suarez has told friends and the press, the still-unnamed agent kicked her out of his room the next morning with only $28 in cab fare.

She caused a ruckus in the hallway, demanding her full payment, while the agent remained locked in the locked hotel room and wouldn’t come out.

Here she is - the hooker at the heart of the Colombian sex scandal rocking the Secret Service.

The stunning snapshots of the sultry Dania Suarez show her cozying up to the camera — and flaunting her considerable assets.

The Daily News was the first to publish photos of the sexy high-priced call girl, a week after she touched off a media maelstrom when one cheapskate agent paid her $28 — instead of the $800 tab they agreed upon for their “date.”

In one picture, the 5-foot-4 brunette beauty is in a bikini at the beach striking a model pose, with her left hand on her hip and her head tilted in a tantalizing fashion.

The 24-year-old single mom of a 9-year-old son is seen in a different picture busting out of a bikini top while she checks out other customers from her table at a restaurant.

And, in another, Suarez kicks back her leg — a pair of sparkly champagne-colored stillettos on her feet — as she leans over a couch in her best come-hither stance.

Even when the native of the island of San Andres dressed more modestly, Suarez still stands out with a pair of white Daisy Duke shorts over her long tan legs.

Up top, she’s sporting a skin-tight black sweater with a tongue-wagging smiley face logo stretching at her chest.

Suarez’ M.O. was to always dress for a “date.”

“She never told us what she did for a living but it was obvious,” said neighbor Maria Quintero, 31. “She was home all day and left late at night looking very nice.”
Suarez’ photos came to light amid a day of fast-paced developments in the Secret Service scandal rocking the agency.:

- Two of the Secret Service supervisors pushed out by the agency were identified by CBS News as veterans Greg Stokes and David Chaney.

- “Several more people will be pushed out,” said Rep. Pete King (R-L.I.), boss of the House Homeland Security Committee, which oversees the Secret Service.

- Investigators were methodically building a case, working to get agents to cooperate. They have not yet extensively grilled the agent who stiffed the hooker — and who was still drunk when they woke up in the morning.

- Investigators were administering polygraph and drug tests to the eight Secret Service employees who are on administrative leave because of their role in the Hotel Caribe brouhaha.

Eleven Secret Service agents — including the three already sacked — and nine military servicemen are under investigation for hiring 20 or 21 hookers in Cartagena last week when they were supposed to be preparing for President Obama’s April 13 arrival at a regional summit.

Stokes, a supervisor who handled the bomb-sniffing dogs, was fired. He is fighting to keep his job, exercising his option to appeal the firing.

Chaney, who was allowed to retire, was a second-generation Secret Service agent: His dad, George Chaney, protected President Lyndon Johnson.

Chaney’s Facebook page is peppered with pictures of him on the job.

He’s seen holding the door on an SUV for 2008 vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin — and his pals comment about how cool the picture is.

“I was really checking her out, if you know what
I mean,” Chaney responded.

He’s also shown in the background at a Palin rally as she waves to the crowd, and again supervising the rope line as she worked the crowd.

Personal pictures show him golfing with buddies and vacationing with family. Bottles of beer and mixed drinks are featured prominently.

White House officials have said the President’s security was not compromised but investigators are looking into whether the agents left sensitive papers in their rooms, where the hookers could have had access to them.

ABC News reported that the men had booked a party space at the hotel expecting a bash for about 30 people. “That allegation is coming from the media, but it is being checked out,” King said.

As the firestorm showed no signs of stalling, Suarez’ neighbors had long suspected she was a high-priced nightwalker.

“I asked her if she worked, she said no,” Quintero said.#

“I asked her if her boyfriend helped her. She said no. Then it hit me.”

Suarez is a quiet tenant who rents a small apartment in a hacienda-style home for about $600 a month. A friend stopped by late Wednesday to pick up her dog, a pug named Valentino.

Another neighbor, Maria Estela Cubides, 45, said Suarez seemed to have a glamorous life out on the town, but kept to herself at home.

“She always left late at night. She traveled a lot, to fancy destinations,” Cubides said. “She never brought guys home. She kept to herself. I’m surprised she did all that noise to get her money. She’s not that kind of person.”

Another neighbor, Dona Betty, said Suarez told people she was a dancer. “She showed up early in the morning, with her heels on her hands,” she said. “We suspected, but she keeps to herself. She is a good mother.”

Meanwhile, the Secret Service, an elite agency which long had a reputation for low-key but lethal competence, has become a punchline.

Spirit Airlines began hawking cheap flights to Cartagena Thursday with an image of a be-suited man sporting dark glasses and an earpiece, surrounded by scantily-clad women. The airline promised “more bang for your buck,” but specified that “upfront payment is required.”

esandoval@nydailynews.com

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