A Couple of Bar Jokes

 


A black guy, an illegal alien, a Muslim and a communist walk into a bar.

The bartender asks,

“What can I get you, Mr. President?”

[Thanks to reader-researcher RC.]

Here’s another one doin’ the rounds that I stole all by myself.

 


Guy goes into a bar, there’s a robot bartender.

The robot says, “What will you have?” The guy says, “Martini.” The robot brings back the best martini ever, and says to the man, “What’s your IQ?” The guy says, “168.” The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration, and medical technology.

The guy leaves, but he is curious, so he goes back into the bar. The robot bartender says, “What will you have?” The guy says, “Martini.” Again, the robot makes a great martini, gives it to the man and says, “What’s your IQ?” The guy says, “100.” The robot then starts to talk about NASCAR, Budweiser, and John Deere tractors.

The guy leaves, but finds it very interesting, so he thinks he will try it one more time. He goes back into the bar. The robot says, “What will you have?” The guy says, “Martini,” and the robot brings him another great martini. The robot then says, “What’s your IQ?” The guy says, “Uh, about 50.” The robot leans in real close and says, “So, you people still happy you voted for Obama?”

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What can I say? I’m the last man on earth to see these things!