Talk about burying your lede! The associated press takes a riot, and turns it into a “scuffle,” but it was the most good-natured riot you’ll ever hear of! (For another “scuffle,” catch the dueling headlines right here at WEJB/NSU!)

By Grand Rapids Anonymous
sunday, december 1, 2024 at 11:15:00 p.m. est

nigs fight after michigan/ohio state football game: one cop goes to the hospital, players pepper-sprayed; ap initially calls it a “scuffle”

grand rapids, mich. (wood) — the university of michigan and its rival, ohio state university, were each fined hundreds of thousands of dollars after the two teams scuffled [!] after a game saturday.

“the game, which was held in ohio stadium, ended with a 13-10 wolverine victory. when michigan players tried to plant their flag on the osu logo, buckeye players confronted them at midfield, which caused a flurry of punches and shoves. police used pepper spray to break up the players.

“‘not only did the actions of both teams violate fundamental elements of sportsmanship such as respect and civility, the nature of the incident also jeopardized the safety of participants and bystanders,’ a statement from big ten read.

“each university was issued a $100,000 institutional fine.

“an officer was injured during the brawl and taken to the hospital, the associated press reported [GRA: Now, it’s a brawl—buried at the bottom.]

GRA: I’m surprised there weren’t gunshots.

--GRA

N.S.: What I want to know is, were the rioters slugging opponents who still had their helmets on?! That’s much more dangerous to the slugger than the sluggee.

Ohio state and michigan (called “A2” by locals in Ann Arbor, which, in a previous life, I used to visit at least once a year—girlfriend’s family) have played each other for about 100 years, and it’s one of those rivalries, where the quality of the given teams in any one year is irrelevant. They play like it’s for the national championship. Over the past app. 20 years, ohio state (whose snobby players have adopted the phrase, “the ohio state university”) has been such a football machine that it’s perennially playing for the national championship, but that didn’t matter to big blue.