lizzo eats puff daddy to fool cops

By Grand Rapids Anonymous

“(GRA) apparently, lizzo ate Sean ‘puffy’ Combs to aid him in hiding from police.

“one black assistant, working for Lizzo, witnessed the ingestion,saying, ‘she swallowed him WHOLE, exactly like she swallows a giant bratwurst. he kind of leaned over and then he disappeared into her stomach.

“no word on if he has exited the rotund lizzo’s digestive system since then, but police may have a cat scan taken, if Combs doesn't ‘turn up’ soon.”

--GRA