Tuesday, January 26, 2021

Snowflakes (Humor)

By A.L.
Tue, Jan 26, 2021 7:41 p.m.

Snowflakes (Humor)

It Snowed Last Night..

8:00 am: I made a snowman.

8:10- A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.

8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.

8:22 - The transgender man..women...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be covered up .

8:40 - The Police arrived saying someone had been offended.

8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43 - The council equity officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

8:45 - TV news crew from ABC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? I replied "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.

9:00 - I was on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10 - I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.

9:29 - Protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding for me to be arrested.

Moral: There is no moral to this story. It is what we have become, all because of snowflakes.

 

3 comments:

  1. jerry pdx
    Ha ha, that's great. Forgot one though: When you coated it with soot to appease the racist black neighbors, they accused you of making a blackface snowman!

    ReplyDelete
  2. And don't let a snowflake read any of that. They will melt.

    ReplyDelete