“This is war!”—iran responds, cvommensurately, to Israel’s friday bombing, by shooting pebbles from two slingshots at tel aviv; Israel weighs options

By Grand Rapids Anonymous
saturday, october 26, 2024 at 12:46:00 p.m. edt

(GRA) Israel sent missiles towards iranian cities and military areas friday evening, but shortly thereafter, it was over—with little damage reported.

In response to Israel’s offensive, iran—as promised—launched a counterattack that the iranian government said, “would equal Israel’s aggression on our country”—and did so—by shooting a few pebbles from slingshots made by an iranian 12-year-old. The pebbles fell far short of the Israeli border.

“‘we hope that our powerful response shows the Israelis that they can expect iran’s military to quickly counter any and all future aggression towards us,’ the Ayatollah Komeni announced.

Israel then warned of a similar tit-for-tat counterattack, and was weighing such options as throwing snowballs—imported from the north pole—or having catapults shoot water balloons—made in taiwan—towards tehran.

“This is WAR,” said a spokesman for Benjamin Netanyahu.

GRA: I’m not saying this is the most feckless war in history—but it’s got to be in the top two.

--GRA